Dating Someone Who Doesn’t Exercise

dating someone who doesn't exercise

I know for some people, dating someone who doesn’t exercise can be challenging, especially if fitness is super important to you, or even if you’re new to working out and trying to integrate it into your life.

In my previous relationship, people used to always joke with my then-boyfriend that he must work out all the time dating me, a fitness instructor.

In actuality? We rarely if ever worked out together.

I can only think of one time in 8 years that he joined me for a run while I was training for a 5K the first summer we were together. He also took my yoga class maybe a handful of times. Otherwise? We never worked out together. And he actually pretty much never worked out during our relationship whereas I went from being clueless about fitness to a full-fledged instructor, marathoner, and all-around fitness enthusiast.


My Thoughts On Dating Someone Who Doesn’t Exercise

It didn’t bother me personally that he didn’t work out. Sure, he probably should work out for the health benefits and his own wellbeing, but as with anything, you can’t push someone to do something they don’t want to do.

We had enough other stuff in common, shared interests, and things we liked to do together, that the fact that we didn’t share this particular interest wasn’t a deal-breaker to me. And if you’re new here, it’s definitely not the reason we eventually broke up.

What actually mattered to me?

It was fine with me that we’d probably never take a SoulCycle class together or motivate each other to train for a big race. What was more important to me was that he supported my passion for fitness.

And that he definitely did.

I’d often times wake up to work out or teach a class first thing in the morning during our weekends together (we didn’t live in the same city so often times weekends were the only time we got to see each other). He never stopped me or complained that I was taking away from our time together by heading out to work out or teach a class.

During our relationship, I trained for and ran the NYC Marathon. He could not have been more supportive of me between the motivating text he’d send during runs, he’d take care of me when I was a mess after long runs, and he spent race day cheering me on IRL.

While I didn’t *need* his support to go through that process, it would’ve sucked if I was dating someone that resented how exhausted I was that summer or how we had to plan our weekends around my long run. His support and encouragement meant way more to me than his willingness to take a fitness class together or his own passion for fitness.

In the future, I’m not sure if dating someone with an interest in fitness and wellness is a top priority to me. I’d just care more that they are supportive of my own love of fitness… and would be cool with me ruining another summer training for marathon 😂

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